- A lack of faith in Joe Burrow taints my first win of the season.
- Against the odds, I came back for a win late Monday night thanks to DeVonta Smith.
- My only hope of salvaging tough wide receiver and running back injuries lies in the waivers.
It's Week 2 of my NFL fantasy league, and my fantasy franchise, the Broncos B Team, officially has a better record than the actual Denver Broncos. The sad state of my home team is offset by my win against one of the top players in my league. I'll be riding this 1-1 high until Thursday when the self-imposed dread of my own overly competitive behavior sets in again. Until then, we'll be doing the same thing we did last week. Here goes nothin'.
Justin Fields (Pittsburgh QB): Jeep Wrangler
Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions. Joe Burrow dropped an excellent 17.22 points this week against KC, but I bet against myself and started Justin Fields. Just 11.38 points of a projected 18.8 later, and I am fully admitting it was my own fault for not liking my original pick better. As is the case with the Ford Bronco (Burrow) and the Jeep Wrangler (Fields), I backed the wrong horse. The Bronco is a better car, just like Burrow was a better fantasy pick. Live and learn.
Jahmyr Gibbs (Detroit RB): Mazda MX-5 Miata
Another week of beating expectations for Jahmyr Gibbs of the Lions. My best pick thus far this season (sorry, Tyreek) beat his 16.9-point projection for a total of 17.6 points against Tampa Bay, who look surprisingly good this year. Gibbs netted 106 yards and seven receptions this week, and as you'll see further down this list, was one of the few players in my lineup to consistently deliver. Just like the Mazda Miata, which consistently delivers on one thing: being a great-driving sports car.
Rachaad White (Tampa Bay RB): Nissan Z Nismo
Rachaad White was overmatched this week against the Lions, on top of a groin injury that could continue to be a problem. He's listed as questionable as of publishing, though the Buccaneers say the injury isn't serious, and he did play through the injury. What is serious was the lack of points as a result: just 3.3 and a total of 23 yards. White's performance this week was just like the Nissan Z Nismo, because it's been allowed to play in a competitive field despite not being at its full potential.
Tyreek Hill (Miami WR): Dodge Challenger
None of what happened this week was Tyreek Hill's fault, but what happened could be the beginning of a difficult season as a result. Dolphins quarterback Tua Tagovailoa suffered a horrific concussion during the team's matchup with the Bills (let's hope for a speedy recovery there). Hill took the bench when backup QB Skylar Thompson took Tagovailoa's place, ending the week with an infuriating 6.6 points. Dead in the water due to forces out of his control, Hill reminds me of the late Dodge Challenger (but more so its Hemi V8). It was also sidelined, though more stringent emissions requirements are more to blame than a quarterback with a concussion.
Deebo Samuel Sr. (San Francisco WR): Clapped VW GTI on 18 pounds of boost
God bless Deeb Samuel Sr. Another great week against a tough matchup. Deebo logged five catches for 54 yards and eight carries for 23 yards, plus a touchdown. Frankly, it doesn't get better than this. Sure, Deebo fell a point shy of his projected (19) for a total of 18 points, but that's a hell of a lot better than pretty much anyone on this squad right now. Deebo blows his competition out of the water, kind of like a hopped-up GTI running too much boost, but he's only done it for the moment. Deebo is out next week, and just like that GTI, there are some performance issues on the horizon for my star WR.
Dalton Kincaid (Buffalo TE): Ford Ranger
Dalton Kincaid of the Bills managed a tidy comeback in Week 2, netting 33 yards for 7.3 points, up from just 2.1 points last week. I'd be more upset about his performance in Week 2 if I had lost. Still, I have to appreciate a good comeback, whether it's Kincaid or the Ford Ranger, which used to be woeful but isn't after a big update in 2023.
DeVonta Smith (Philly WR): Toyota GR86 (Subaru BRZ)
DeVonta Smith inherited a larger role on the Eagles' offense after A.J. Brown's hamstring injury, and he sure earned his keep. Smith nailed 7/10 targets for a tidy 76 receiving yards, a touchdown, and 20.6 points. Without a doubt, DeVonta Smith saved me this week, as I was down a full 10 points going into Monday's matchup against the Falcons. Go, Birds, I guess. Anyway, he reminds me of the Toyota GR86/ Subaru BRZ twins, which save a little bit of my jaded car enthusiast soul every time I drive one.
Nick Bosa (San Francisco DE): Kia Telluride
Again, Nick Bosa shows up for work. Moreover, the 49er defensive end doubled his Week 1 score for a total of 2 points off five tackles, two of which were sacks. I couldn't be happier with Bosa's performance yet again, and his 2 points helped stop the bleeding when he matched my opponent's defensive player in score. Bosa looks a whole lot like the Kia Telluride, which has been consistently great since its debut.
Jacksonville Jaguars (Defense): Jaguar XF
After the Browns' D dropped some disappointing numbers last week, I recalled my old fantasy strategy from last season: Pick the defense with the most favorable matchup off waivers and play 'em. It only half worked. The Jags let in 16 points, and in my league, all Defenses start with 10 points. This, plus two sacks, generated just 5 points in total. Like a real Jaguar XF, the Jag's defense was a letdown with some small redeeming factors that don't make up for the performance on the whole. I'm hoping my pick-and-choose strategy works out better next week.
Evan McPherson (Cincinnati K): Audi RS 6 Avant Performance
The Bengals' Evan McPherson continues to earn his spot: He made four of his four regular attempts and half of his extra-point attempts. It wasn't enough to stave off the Chiefs, but it was enough to net me 16 points, keeping me in the running for the win leading into Monday night. He vastly outperformed his previous Week 1 total (6 points), and the updated performance was a real difference-maker, just like it is in the Audi RS 6 Avant Performance. For 2024 the Audi saw a big bump from 591 horsepower to 621 hp, more robust suspension, and sharper handling — it makes all the difference in the world.
Week 3 looks to be another rough matchup. However, my opponent has Isiah Pacheco, who is almost certainly headed for injured reserve. I've got some messes of my own to clean up too, with Deebo down and White still questionable, I need to hit the waivers and plug some holes. Hopefully swapping Christian Kirk (bench) for Rashid Shaheed can fix my wide receiver issue, and dropping Tyjae Spears for Zack Moss, who lines up against the pitiful Commanders, will stop the bleeding. I'll also snag the Buccaneers D, betting on the Broncos' continued poor performance. I feel guilty, but if anything, it'll be a mark of pride to beat my home team's real-life NFL record with my fantasy franchise.
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